Change in course

As I mentioned in an earlier post, God has ways of getting our attention when He needs to. The story of what led us to head to Ecuador would not be complete without mention of Jonny.

Jonny and I became instant friends in first grade and where extremely close through our teenage years. We shared a love of cars, trucks, dirt bikes, music and on and on. We grew up together. And he was the best man in my wedding. Our lives took different directions, but our relationship didn't change. Sometimes after several months he would stop over and we would pick up like we had been together the day before. I tried to explain our relationship to Michelle one time and she cut me off saying "I know that, just because I am your wife, I could call Jonny anytime of the night or day and he would drop everything and come running." Yep, that about sums it up.

In 2000, I really seemed to have it all. Married to the girl of my dreams, I had 3 beautiful kids, a nice house, a boat and a good career. Then it disaster struck. Jonny was killed in an industrial accident. My world started to fall apart. Things I thought I knew weren't making sense anymore. Part of me was gone. How could this be? I had lost grandparents and old family friends, and while painful it still made sense. They lived a long life and then as time took its toll, their health started to fail and eventually they passed on. But Jonny was only 35! Never married, no kids! He had been part of my life forever. How could he just be gone?

Through the grieving and pain, God began to show me some things. That life is not all about me and my happiness. That there is more to life than acquiring stuff and living for myself. He showed me that it is relationships that truly matter. And foremost, a real relationship with Him. Not as a backup plan when I get into trouble, but as a heartfelt desire to know Him better and to trust Him with everything.

Of course I still miss Jonny, but lately I have been able to thank God for the years we did have together. I celebrate the memories I have of him. I look back at the things that God has taught me through this most unpleasant period, and I just have to thank Him for being patient with me.

Perspective

Last Sunday, I was talking with a friend at church when we heard some commotion right behind us. A frantic lady had a small child in her arms that was choking on something. The little girl was clearly struggling for air and turning colors by the time I saw her. I merely tried to comfort her while another lady administered the blows to her back that dislodged the piece of candy. The sound of her crying was music to our ears. What a relief to know that life-giving oxygen was once again entering her body.

It was over in seconds, but something changed in me in that instant. When I saw that little girl's struggle for survival, life suddenly become more precious. I was happier to see friends and I was eager to say "Hi" to people I didn't know. Holding my wife's hand during service was never sweeter. I was paying attention to the little things around me like never before. Little things like people, relationships, and life itself. Things that I think matter to God, as well.

As Jesus hung on the cross there were two criminals, one on either side. They were both talking trash and ridiculing Jesus along with the crowd. But then something happened in one of them. They both seemingly witnessed the same things, but only one got what was going on and recognized Him as the Son of God. His perspective changed. (Luke 23:32-43)

Some of us need a harder jolt than others, but God has ways of getting our attention when He needs to. I have to wonder how much I am missing when I am too caught up in myself to see Him at work all around me.

Cleaning fish

My father-in-law has always been good at breaking things down to pretty simple terms. When my wife and I were wrestling with me taking a high-paying job that required a lot of travel, he broke it down to Michelle like this: "Do you want to have steak every night by yourself, or would you like to eat hamburger with Steve here?" So in direct opposition to that which most of the world would consider important, we wisely took his advice.

Over the weekend, my son returned home from a school fishing trip with a cooler full of trout. Trout are different from other fish and need to be cleaned in a special way. We called my father-in-law, an experienced fisherman, for some help in cleaning the fish. He kind of apologized saying that he had never cleaned trout and had no idea how to do it. So I started checking the web for some advice and found a YouTube video that explained everything. The next thing I know, my father-in-law is standing at the door with his filet knife. He said "After I hung up I decided I might not even be around the next time you have some trout to clean, so I'd better get over here!"

Isn't that a great attitude to have? Not morbid, but instead having a sense of urgency in seizing the moment because we don't know what tomorrow will bring. Looking at life's interruptions as opportunities instead of nuisances. And valuing relationships over personal comfort. I want to be more like that.

Heartache

Good friends of our's opened their home recently to a little girl that needed a place to stay. They treated her as one of the family. They cared for and provided for her, and they loved her unconditionally. Then in the blink of an eye, things changed. What they thought was going to be a few years, suddenly was over. She had to be relocated far away into an unknown situation. My heart aches with them. We all fell in love with that little girl. But even with all of the emotional, physical and financial stress, I think they would do it again. They saw a need that they could help with and they acted. Even though it set them up for great pain, they responded with great love. Because that is the same kind of love that God gives us. Agape love - love that goes out in spite of what comes back.